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When I decided to go back into the classroom last summer after spending the previous 4 years working on Saddle Up for 2nd Grade full time, the majority of people I talked to about my decision thought I was crazy. I was working from home, I had a successful business, and I had the freedom to be my own boss. They thought, why would I want to give that up? In today’s blog post, I’m being honest and raw and sharing a teacher reflection on my year back in the classroom.
This is not my typical blog post. In fact, what I’m getting ready to share is probably one of the most honest things I’ve ever shared in my little space on the internet. I want to share my teacher reflection on coming back to the classroom this year after working Saddle Up for 2nd Grade and Teachers Pay Teachers full time. Returning to the classroom was a huge change for me and my family.
When I was thinking about what I wanted to share, I imagined the idea of having a conversation with a friend while sitting in my backyard. If you’d like to pretend that we are hanging out and having a heart to heart conversation about this past school year as I reflect on things, click play and watch this YouTube video. You can listen to me talk while you’re cooking dinner or folding laundry. There is no fancy editing or visuals in this one. It’s more real that what I can type out for you here but if you’d prefer to read my story, keep on scrolling.
I wanted to share a bit about my backstory and how I got to where I am today.
First, a little rewind: I just wrapped up my 10th year in the classroom, but it’s actually been 14 years in education overall. I started teaching in Texas, where I taught first and second grades for several years. When my second daughter was born in 2018, I made the tough decision to leave the classroom and stay home with my two kids. Financially, it didn’t make sense for my entire paycheck to go towards daycare, so my husband and I decided it was best for me to step back.
That’s when Saddle Up for Second Grade transformed from a side hustle into my full-time job. I started Saddle Up in 2012 as a fun hobby, and it’s grown into something I’m incredibly proud of. It’s given me opportunities and dreams I never imagined.
In 2019, our family faced a big challenge when my husband unexpectedly lost his job. This led us to move from Texas to Oklahoma in February 2020, just before the pandemic hit. Uprooting our family from all I had ever known was not easy for me. A week after moving, everything completely shut down and I had never felt so isolated in my life.
During this period, Saddle Up for Second Grade exploded in growth. I launched a program called Managing Math Stations, an online professional development course for teachers. It was a huge success, helping around 780 teachers in just the second year.
When we moved, I literally poured everything that I had into Saddle Up for 2nd grade, and it paid off exponentially but I almost lost myself in the process.
Despite the growth, by last summer, I was dealing with extreme burnout. The hustle and grind had taken a toll on me. I felt creatively drained and isolated, spending most of my days alone working from home.
Then, a turning point came. At a birthday party, several parents mentioned a second-grade teaching position at the local school. Initially, I wasn’t interested, but the very next day, I felt a strong sense that God was leading me to do something different. After discussing it with my husband and praying about it, I decided to apply. I gave the decision to Him and said, Lord if this is where you want me then you need to show me. Within 36 hours, I interviewed and was hired.
God really has a sense of humor when it comes to your plan verses His plan.
Over the past several years, I’ve noticed that social media has amplified the negative aspects of education more than ever before. If I open Instagram right now, the first five posts I see are likely to be teachers wanting to leave the profession. I get it. Teaching is hard.T It’s one of the most challenging things you’ll ever do. But this constant negativity is disheartening, and I’ve seen how it contributes to teacher burnout and the loss of many great educators.
I wanted to use this opportunity to be a light in the teaching community, not just as a blogger, curriculum designer, or a merperson that you follow on Instagram. I aim to be a beacon of light for both teachers and students. I’ve witnessed firsthand the impact of negativity on kids through my work with teachers worldwide over the past several years. Now, more than ever, it’s important to focus on the positive and support each other in this challenging profession.
Returning to the classroom has been a journey. The biggest challenge was the change in student behavior and respect for authority.
The contrast in classroom dynamics before and after the pandemic was stark. Previously, I could rely on established routines and a mutual respect between teacher and students. However, this time, I found myself dealing with a noticeable lack of respect for authority among the kids in my class.
Another challenge was that students always needed rewards to do basic tasks. They seemed to expect incentives for even the simplest things, which made managing the classroom harder. This change in what students expected meant I had to come up with new ways to keep order and get them to participate. Instead of doing what they were supposed to because it was right, they often thought, “What’s in it for me?” This mindset made every lesson and interaction more difficult.
I also taught my daughter this year. Looking back on it, it was truly a memorable experience. She is a natural learner and thrives in a school environment. However, I faced some parent backlash over favoritism, which I knew was a possibility. Luckily, my administration is wonderful and gave me full support during theses instances.
Despite these challenges, I found immense joy in teaching my own 2nd grade math curriculum and seeing it work firsthand. It was such a humbling experience to personally put to use what I had spent so many years creating. I loved seeing what worked well and what could be changed.
This past year taught me a lot about balance. Although I was mentally exhausted at times, I learned how to manage my workload better. Now, I’m looking forward to the next school year with new energy and ideas.
This summer, I’m focusing on rest and preparing for exciting new ventures, like the Inner Circle Math Membership for first through third-grade teachers. This membership aims to provide differentiated resources without breaking the bank.
For now, I’m taking the time to find myself again, both as an educator and an entrepreneur. I still think that right now, being in the classroom, that is where God wants me to be. I have this goal of sharing the light of God’s word with educators. I’m excited to do that through the platform that He has given me here and over on Teachers Who Pray
If you’re still with me, thank you for reading my teacher reflection TedTalk.
I’m grateful for where I am and excited for what’s ahead.
